I’m afraid to relive memories with P. (x-ap) but I’m also afraid to not relive them. To relive them brings sadness, longing and yes..regrets for what is gone. But…if I force those memories out of my mind and heart, they begin to fade.
Fading should be a good result considering the circumstance but it causes panic as well. If the memories have the ability to fade from my mind and heart, that means they have probably already faded from his.
I don’t want to lose the memories. If I lose the memories, I lose what is left of us. But if I keep the memories alive, I keep the sadness alive as well. Double edge sword.